Let’s plays = videos where people play video or computer games. Sometimes more than one person is present. The ones I enjoy often have an element of explanation of the player’s actions.
Live stream = like live t.v. Watching real time footage. Websites like Twitch enable anyone with an account on that site to chat through text in a designated spot on the screen.
You might be happy to know that my ‘crush’ problem is somewhat dissipated. I still love live streams and daily let’s plays (here on lps) but I’m starting to see a problem they pose for someone like me – regretfully unemployed and yearning for attention that gives purpose to existence. I suppose it’s also the poison in ‘hope’.
Let’s put it this way, I’m becoming addicted to these shows. I’m sure similar things happen with online games and other internet communities but I haven’t had any experience with those so I have no real authority to state an opinion. What I ~do~ know is that it’s getting harder and harder to stop watching and do things that I need to do.
The communities, fans and the people who make lps are usually wonderful, amazing, kind and generous people. This makes it easy to idolize them. When they mention you, talk to you or even share the same opinion as you, you can start to get lost in it. It gives you that happy feeling of being accepted, that you matter, that you can do what they’re doing because you’ve got one opinion that they share…And then you make another comment and wait. Before you know it the whole day’s passed and you haven’t done anything. You feel like you’ve said something wrong or that you need to try harder to be ‘one of them’.
This and the next point probably contribute to why my crush is being, well, crushed. It takes a lot of emotional energy to wait for rectification like that and, although a random wouldn’t just get magically accepted into a tight knit community like many of these are, it still kind of feels like rejection. It’s irrational but hope isn’t always rational.
As I’ve mentioned before (I think), seeing someone in person is very different to knowing ~of~ them. Watching someone on t.v. or on the internet is different to knowing them in person (of course). When you don’t know them personally it’s easy to forget their faults and to make believe that you’ll get on like a house on fire, all will be eses and gees, you’ll be soul mates. If you make some kind of small contact with that person or someone near them that brings you ~this much~ closer to making your dream/ fantasies come true. Often that dream isn’t really worth it. I have to keep reminding myself that these are people with faults that I might not be able to handle if I met them. They are not perfect, they don’t really have life figured out and, although they’re wonderful people, I can’t let myself get carried away on a dream.
The temptation of daily content and live streams that last for hours at a time don’t help my inner struggles. Although the people I follow aren’t perfect I want to support them and watching videos, subscribing and giving encouragement are all good ways to do this. But, like commenting and waiting for a reply, watching videos takes up a looot of time. Especially when you’re subscribed to as many channels or more as I am. And it seems like a convenient way to pass the time while you’re waiting for someone to reply to your comment. If there’s any lesson to be learned here it’s to keep track of how much time you’re investing. It can be hard when they’re asking you to subscribe and like at the end of any video when you want to help them and you don’t ~need~ too do anything else today.
What else did I want to mention? I know that these communities and schedules are good for some people. Video Games Awesome was one of my first experiences with lps. Sometimes they open mail from fans on the show. There’ve been quite a few letters from fans who are pretty well bed ridden thanking the hosts and the chat for supporting them and being such a positive influence. Heck, they probably motivate these kinds of people to get up and go places where as here I am on my butt. For another group watching someone else play a game you’re interested in but not quite excited for can be the thing that makes you buy that game. They’re also a pretty good way for someone interested in video games to learn a bit more about them. Or parents wanting to get a game for their kid and look it up and see if it’s right…Not all lper’s are as educational or professional as some of the ones I watch but you get the idea.
People like me who have a known addiction with social media already should be careful. I’m used to going through my facebook news feed and reading everything. It’s just not possible with lps because many of them are 20 + minutes long. You see where I’m coming from. If this were a constructive hobby I wouldn’t be berating myself like so much but, no, all I do is sit on my ass and ruin my back and eyes.
This raises the question as to how you prevent people like me getting so absorbed in the lp universe or even just the internet. Is it the responsibility of the lper or the person watching? Should there be a screening process before someone is allowed on websites like this? Well, they don’t do that for tv so why should they for the internet?….But you ~do~ get a lot of idiots on the internet commenting and trolling where they’re not welcome…Ahg, who am I kidding. I’d like to think that it’s my own responsibility to get out of this cycle but if there was anything they could do to make it less… tempting or more exclusive that would be nice. There are probably channels out there that do. That’s probably half the reason I like VGA. I love those guys but I haven’t felt the temptation to become quite as obsessed with watching their shows every day and every stream.
And there’s another thing. Live streams. Some of them aren’t on a regular schedule and a lot of them are in the US so getting to see one can feel like a victory against the winds of fate. I really don’t know why I feel this way about them. There might also be an idea that it’s more pure than a posted video; you get to see it warts and all but whatever.
Anyway I’ve gone on way too long again. Let’s keep this post untagged like the rest of them and hope no one finds it, ey? I probably raise some good points but I’m too lazy to edit and before you know it I’ll delete it because I’m embarrassed or feel like I’ll offend someone. I really have no authority on any subject because my brain can’t absorb information and I can’t research or nuts but that’s another blog post in the making.
Anyway, happy new year and all that 🙂